Confession of a prayer…

I didn’t last night.  And now I’m a bit sad.  But not as sad as I was this morning.

You see, there was a woman last night who requested prayer for things work out for them in the adoption world.  She didn’t disclose much information, I was tired and didn’t exactly know what to say to God.  I didn’t pray.  I LOVE praying.  This morning I find out exactly what I didn’t want to hear. 

Victoria has lost her family.  It was her future mom requesting prayer.  They are unable to complete 3 SN adoptions right now and Max is incredibly close to the Mom’s heart.  A painful decision for them to make.  I keep wanting to tell myself it’s because we are supposed to be Victoria’s family…one thing I know for sure.  God has a plan for this little girl and I can’t wait to see it play out!

I had reached a point where I felt I was bothering God with the “small stuff”.  We all know there is no “small” with God.  He WANTS us to fully rely on Him for everything!!!  I chose a different path last night, and I’m sorry.  God knows my heart, knows I”m sorry, and I will not dwell on it.  BUt I did want to share.  I also know that God doesn’t have a “quota” for prayer and he has a plan for her, his Word says so!!

For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, saith the LORD, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you an expected end.  (Jeremiah 29:11 kjv)

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2 responses »

  1. Tammy,

    We are fully trusting God with Victoria. We have those very similar feelings as you too. Yesterday Randy and I had a long drive for our fingerprints and lots of time to talk and pray. I broke down in tears as I thought about Victoria and having to walk out of those doors once again and leaving a piece of my heart behind and in these conditions. I have to trust in the same way we have for Max the last 4 years that the plan God has is divine and perfect even when it doesn’t feel that way to us.
    God delights in your tender and merciful heart!

    You and I will contend for Victoria together and we will rejoice together one day!

    Bless you!
    Tina

  2. Let me begin by saying…I LOVE that more people want to see these children (her in particular) get a loving home than letting her be there. I can’t imagine how your heart will feel if you are unable to take her too. I just want her to have a home with awesome siblings!!! 😉 Did you get to meet her?! Do you think you will be able to get it all worked out and take her too? She WILL find a loving home…that much I think we all know 😉

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